Visibility
by Charmkeeper
Summary: AU. KuroFai. What is the meaning of the word invisible? For Fai Flourite it means no one around you can see you. For Kurogane Youou it means that your beloved one can't see how much you love them. Can a word have multiple meanings for multiple people?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Has it been forever since I posted anything or what? Geez...and now I am once again posting a new story. I was originally intending for this to be a one-shot, but I developed plot and stuff and it just did not turn out that way. Allah save my soul.

Luckily, I don't think this story will be terribly long, nor is it's plot mind-numbingly deep. It's a simple story I think, and I hope you all enjoy it...

As always, read, review, enjoy.

* * *

_I'm invisible! I thought this move to a new place, to a new school would help me. I truly did. I thought that if I moved somewhere new where people did not have an image of me ingrained in their mind that I would make friends! _

_What am I doing wrong? I'm smiling and I take the initiative! I talk to people, invite them to spend time with me if I think it's going well. I'm warm and open...I'm even top of my class, and I don't boast._

_What am I doing wrong? Why am I so invisible? Not even the teacher knows I'm there..._

"Hey! What's with you? This room's supposed to be empty! Hey!" Fingers curled into blonde locks and pulled Fai into a sitting position, "Hey! What's wrong? You're crying!" Fai stared blankly at a handsome face with red eyes for a moment before his vision was blocked by a hand that attempted to dry his tears. "What's wrong?!"

Fai shook his head slowly, as if to say that there was nothing wrong. "Don't give me that crap! What class are you in?"

"T-This one..."

"No way, this class went on a field trip today!"

"I know," Fai whispered, "I had forgotten something in my locker, so I went to get it, and when I got back...they were gone. Bus and all." He wasn't even sure how they had done all that in the minute or so it had taken him to run to his locker and back, but somehow they had.

"Didn't you tell anyone?!"

Fai shrugged, "I did. I don't really think they heard me. What does it matter? I can just go home now right? Class is over?" Fai gave a laugh sobbing laugh as more tears ran down his face.

"Hey! Don't cry!" The red-eyed person looked around the room before he pulled at Fai's arm, "Come on!"

"Where are we going?"

"I'm supposed to be on cleaning duty today, but I'm cutting. You're coming with me. Come on."

"But..."

"Come on. I'm not taking no for an answer!"

The boy pulled Fai from his chair and led him out of the room, down the hall, and right out of school. Fai had no idea where they were going, and as the boy pushed Fai onto a park bench, he still didn't know. "I'll be back. You don't move. Not an inch." Fai was then left alone to watch the wind blow as the other boy walked off.

_Where's he going? _Fai wondered. _Is he going to come back like he said he would? Or will he too forget that I exist and leave? He'll probably leave. I would leave me too. After all, my own teacher forgot I existed and left without me. Surely this boy will forget. Even if he doesn't mean to. _

Fai's hands gripped to his knees as he thought, _Maybe I should leave. Go home. The boy did tell me to not move...but he'll forget to come back, and if I don't go home, I'll end up being stupid and sit here all night..._

"Here." Fai looked up and his eyes widened as there stood the red-eyed boy, shoving a Styrofoam cup into the blond's face. "Drink it. It's warm, it's cold outside."

"What is it?" Even as he asked, Fai reached out and took the cup from the boy. It was warm, and its warmth made him give the smallest of small smiles.

"It's rat poison," the boy said sarcastically as he sat down next to Fai taking a sip from his own cup. "It's cocoa, idiot Mage."

Fai frowned, "Mage?"

"Yeah, Mage. I know, it's not your name, but I don't know your name. To me, not only do you look foreign, but you look magical, like a mage."

"Oh...My name is Fai...but no one's ever given me a nickname before. It's kinda nice."

"Yeah...I like Mage better for you anyway. My name is Kurogane."

"Kuro-chan."

Kurogane looked at Fai and opened his mouth to object, but closed it again after a moment of staring at the blond in front of him. "I guess. I'll allow it. Drink your cocoa."

Fai smiled a little as he brought the cup to his lips. _I'm not invisible after all. Even if it's just one person...I'm visible. _The boy gave a small laugh at his next thought, _If he was a girl, I would probably fall in love with him, just like in all the fairy tales._


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I got good reactions from the first chapter, that means that this story will go well. Mind you though, for now this is just a story I'm doing on the side, some of my other fics are more important, because I need to finish them up or just simply get an update out after I finally broke through my writer's block.

I set up the basic plot of this story in this chapter. No, it wasn't last chapter, last chapter was just a simple introduction, this is plot-time, unless as I think the plot changes again.

Read, review, enjoy.

* * *

"In the three years I've known you, you've never allowed me to come home with you. Are you sure that's all right?"

Fai's blond hair moved back and forth as he walked forward. "Of course it's all right. I checked with my parents. They said it was okay. Although they'll only be there for a minute. They're going out on a business trip today."

"Do they do that often?"

"Most weeks. I'd say they're gone more than they're there." The bus doors opened and Kurogane made sure Fai went in front of him onto the bus. Fai had a strange ability. At first Kurogane had not been able to believe it, but the more he had been around the boy he'd discovered it was true. No one but Kurogane could see Fai. This wasn't to say that Fai was truly invisible. People would notice if they bumped into him, they would notice if he said something. The problem was that somehow Fai had an air of insignificance around him and no one paid any attention to if he was there or not. Kurogane feared that if he got on the bus first the bus driver would shut the doors before Fai could get on.

"That sucks. That means you spend most of your time..."

"Alone? Yes." Fai sat down in an empty seat and Kurogane sat down next to him.

"Do you have any siblings?"

"I used to. A brother."

"You've never spoken about him."

Fai shrugged as the bus lurched forward. "I never felt the need to. He died in a car accident six years ago. We were very close...I don't like talking about it."

Kurogane nodded, "Then I won't mention it again, Mage."

"Thank you...Kuro-chan." Kurogane smiled very slightly as he saw Fai smile too. Fai liked his nickname that he had given him on the day they had met, so Kurogane never failed to call him by that name. Although Kurogane often found his nickname to be utterly annoying, no one else knew the name, and since it was only Fai, he allowed it.

"So...how many stops until we get off?"

"Ten."

Kurogane raised an eyebrow. "You live a little far from school...isn't there one closer to you?"

"There is...but it's more expensive. Its tuition is higher."

"Not that much! It must cost more to ride the bus each day."

"But I pay for that out of my own money."

"What if you ran out of your allowance?"

"I'd be forced to walk."

Kurogane couldn't believe it, "Wait, your parents can see you, can't they?"

"If they want to."

Kurogane shook his head, not understanding how that could possibly work. He opened his mouth to speak, but then he was cut off. "Excuse me, could you scoot over?"

Kurogane turned his head to see a young woman staring at him, "The seat's taken."

The woman shook her head. "Look, I'm getting off at the next..."

"The seat's taken!" Fai said loudly, loud enough that Kurogane's ears rung. The voice was not at all angry, but sad. The woman had obviously not seen him there.

"Oh! I'm sorry. I didn't notice you. No wonder it's taken." The woman gave a nervous laugh and moved on.

Fai sighed and sunk in his seat. "It's no problem," he whispered, "No one ever does."

"Mage."

"I'm fine. You see me, right? That's all I'll ever need Kuro-chan." Fai looked up at him with a bright smile. "I could not pick a better person to be able to see me." After this was said, Fai turned his head and looked out the window as the bus continued its rounds.

While Fai watched the outside, Kurogane watched Fai. If other people could see him, he knew that Fai would be a desired person. People would flock to him and many girls would want to date him. He was a beautiful boy. Not a girlish man, Fai may have been skinny, but everything else about him gave off that air of being a male. Many girls loved pretty men, and among such men Fai would have been royalty.

If other people could see Fai, Kurogane would not have the relationship he did with Fai. Fai would have many other people to talk to, and he highly doubted that Fai would go straight home after school. He had often thought that it would be better if people could see Fai, because he thought that perhaps Fai would happier with other people.

In the beginning, on those days when he and Fai would just walk and talk on the winter afternoons, Kurogane had wished that other people could know of Fai's brilliance, but he wished that no longer. Kurogane knew it was a greedy thought, but he now wanted this young man's brilliance all to himself.

He had not realized it until the beginning of this year, their last year of high school, but he had completely fallen in love with this 'Mage'.

"I love you..." Kurogane whispered the words so softly that no one who was not a canine should have been able to hear him, yet Fai's head spun around to look at him.

"Did you say something?"

"Nothing."

Fai smiled, "If you're sure." Quickly, Fai took Kurogane's hand, wrapped both his hands around it and went back to looking out the window. Taking Kurogane's hand and holding onto it was a habit that Fai had picked up out of fear that Kurogane would forget he was there and leave, but at times like these Kurogane was glad the blond had picked up the habit.

__

I wish you could love me too. Then I could truly shield you from all the pain you feel.

* * *

"Are you pulling my leg? This is where you live?"

"Yes, why would I lie to you?" Fai let go of Kurogane's hand at long last as they approached what seemed to be a mansion to Kurogane. Mansion was an overstatement, but it was bigger than any house he had ever been in, three stories and he was sure that he saw an attic at the top of it.

"It...just seems so big for a family that consists of you and two parents that aren't usually home."

"It is...but the famous must have big things, right?"

"Famous?"

Fai laughed as he ran up a couple of stairs. "Not celebrity famous. I guess well-known is a better term. My parents are well-known herbologists."

Kurogane thought on this fact for a long minute before he said, "That must suck."

For a moment the blond boy paused, "Yes. That's not the average response someone gives to money and fame, but yes, it really does suck. My invisibility helps with that though." As Fai opened the door Kurogane found himself surrounded by splendor. Everything seemed like magic had placed it in just the right spot, the colors on the walls perfectly matched the perfect flooring, and there was not a speck of dust or dirt to be seen. It was like walking into a fairy tale, a very unhappy fairy tale.

"Well?" Fai began, gently pulling Kurogane forward before closing the door, "What do you think Kuro-chan?"

Kurogane stared at it all for a minute, taking in all of it. When he had finally figured out exactly what he thought he spoke, "It's very cold in here."

Fai frowned, "What do you mean? It's plenty warm, but I can turn up the thermostat if..."

"No...it's cold. There's no love in this house. There's no laughter, no joy, no happiness...it's cold." _I don't like it. Fai needs laughter, love, joy, and more. Without it, it's like he died and went to hell. Fai needs warmth. He needs it like a plant needs sunlight._

"There can be no laughter or love when there's no one in the house to share it with." Fai chortled as he began to pull off his boots, gloves, and coat. "There is no point in being happy...or sad for that matter, when there's no one around to share it with."

After a moment more of staring Kurogane realized that he too should be removing his outdoor wear and began to mimic Fai's actions. "But Mage, what about a pet? Even an animal would be able to help."

"My parents won't let me get a cat, dog, fish, or hamster. The cat and dog will ruin the furniture, the bird will make too much noise, and the hamster is too small. I might lose track of it."

_The mage? Lose track of something? God damn, he would constantly know where his pet was, and that cat and dog would be so well trained that there wouldn't even be scratches on the floor from where they walked! At least if how Fai treats people has anything to do with how he treats animals..._

Kurogane scoffed. "Where are your parents?"

"Probably packing their stuff into the car in the garage."

"Can I meet them before they go?"

"Erm...sure, I guess...this way." Fai tugged at Kurogane's shirt-sleeve to get the red-eyed boy to follow him out of the entrances, into the kitchen, down a small flight of stairs into the garage.

"Mama? Papa?" Fai's voice said in a louder tone than he normally used when speaking to Kurogane. As Kurogane looked toward the car he did in fact see two people, a man and woman. They both had the same blond hair and blue eyes as Fai. The woman was very pretty, Kurogane could easily see her being Fai's mother, the man on the other hand was far too rugged looking to have anything to do with Fai's gentle and smooth features.

Fai obviously took after his mother, thankfully.

The mother looked up, "Did you hear Yuui's voice just now?"

Kurogane frowned, _Who's Yuui?_

"No, I believe it was just Fai." The father looked up, "And his friend apparently. Come here little one."

Kurogane couldn't believe those last two words. _Little one?! He's seventeen years old! And taller than both of you! Don't call him little one! That's damn insulting!_

Even though such thoughts were running through Kurogane's mind Fai gripped to Kurogane's wrist and pulled him closer to Fai's parents. "Yes, it's me, and Kurogane, I told you I was going to bring him home with me, didn't I?"

Kurogane's eyes widened for a moment, in all the time he had known Fai, he had never called him by his full name. He had also never heard Fai speak with such little emotion. This house truly was devoid of love and warmth.

"Oh yes, that boy you run around with on weekends." Fai's father turned to Kurogane and spared him a small smile, "Thank you for taking care of him, he's become so much more tolerable since he starting being around you."

Now rage flared up in Kurogane's chest, and one of his hands tightened into a fist, _Tolerable?!_Sure, Fai could be utterly annoying, with his crazy nicknames and the way he ran around and said words of nonsense, and any guy would find some of his cling to be a turn off, but even in the days when he had just started to hang out with this 'mage' Kurogane had never found him to be truly intolerable.

"Kurogane." He heard Fai's voice whisper from beside him, "Answer. He expects it of you."

Kurogane grit his teeth and forced his hand to unclench, "Of course. My pleasure, Sir."

* * *

"You're staying the night?"

"Yeah," Kurogane said as he sat down the phone. "The hospital is near here, and my father will come pick me up some time tomorrow afternoon so we can go visit mother." Kurogane came back over to Fai and threw himself back in the seat next to him. "I assume that's all right, Mage?"

"Of course, I like spending time with you, but I have to think about what we're going to eat for dinner..."

Kurogane turned so that he was facing Fai a little bit more, "What do you mean?"

"Well, I usually just eat a sandwich or something, and my parents don't stock up, we just buy what we need to when we need to..."

"We'll order something when the time comes. I have money, you obviously have money you can take from your parents, whether they like it or not. We'll go out and order pizza or something and then blow the rest of it on junk food."

Fai smiled, "Yeah, that sounds good. Well, if you're staying the night, I should show you the guest bedroom..."

"No way."

"Hm?"

"If I'm staying the night, we're going to do it right. You sleep in your bed while I sleep on the floor bundled up in as many blankets as you can find. Isn't that how it always is when you stay at my house?"

"Yes..." Fai slowly nodded, not seeming to truly understand. "But that's because you don't have an extra bed."

"That and because it's more fun that way. Come on, show me your room."

The two boys got up from the couch and made their way up the stairs, and about halfway down the hall Fai stopped. "Step back please." When Kurogane obeyed the blond reached up with one hand and pulled on a small string, revealing another set of stairs. "Up you go."

"You live in the attic?"

"Yep. That way no one would find me during a gathering or something, even if they could see me."

"That's cruel."

"But useful, and besides, the attic is bigger than any of the regular bedrooms. I like it."

Kurogane clambered on up the stairs and when he finally reached the top of them he was amazed at what he saw. Fai's room was large and the walls were bare, but all across the floor, bed, dresser, and desk were beautiful paintings. Some of them were abstract, others were realistic. Some paintings were landscapes, other were of people. As Kurogane looked to one corner he even saw a painting of himself in a winter's coat and scarf, holding onto a cup filled with a steaming liquid. Kurogane was sure that this was a memory painting of when he and Fai had met.

"Yoo hoo! Kuro-chan! Move! I need to get up!" Quickly Kurogane moved out of the way and took refuge on a spot on Fai's bed that was not taken up by canvas. "What held you up?" Fai asked as he finally got himself up into the room and pulled the collapsible stairs back into their place.

"The paintings."

Fai looked utterly confused, "What about them? I've told you that I paint in my spare time."

"This is more than a spare time thing Mage. This...this..."

"Is awful?"

"What?! No! They're beautiful. I can't recall ever seeing such skilled artwork."

"You flatter me...it's just a hobby..."

"This could be a profession."

"Well...thanks?" Kurogane stared at Fai's face and instantly understood. No one else had ever seen this before. No one else had ever complimented him on this before. The blond had never had any support in doing what he was good at or loved doing, and now to have someone hand him compliments left and right was awkward.

"It's true. Mage?"

"Yes?"

"Would you paint something for me? Before graduation?"

Fai blinked and then gracefully fell down onto the floor in a cross-legged position. The look on his face was a mixture of confusion and curiosity. "Sure, I don't see why I couldn't. What would you want me to paint? I could paint your mother, your father, your house, the park, the school..."

"You."

"Huh?" The blond tilted his head to one side. "Me?"

"Yes, I want a self portrait. I want to know how you see yourself."

"That's a little silly, I'm nothing to look at..."

_Nothing to look at? I could stare at you for years and never get bored..._

"Well, prove that to me. Show me that you're not anything to look at."

"I don't have to!" Fai's eyes grew very wide and he stretched his arms out from side to side, as if he were holding onto a very large object. "Everyone else around agrees, and they didn't have to hear the statement. If I was something to look at, people would notice me."

"Well, I notice you, and I want to see what you see. Besides after graduation, I don't think we'll be seeing each other very much, and I want something that looks like you, from you."

Fai seemed to think this over, "That's very true." From Fai's thin lips came a soft sigh, "Well then, if I do that for you, I want you to buy a new notebook, and fill it with random thoughts and notes to me, but you're not to give it to me until graduation. And take really good care of it, I want to be able to read it when I get lonely."

Kurogane closed his eyes. A book full of his thoughts, that was fine with him, Fai wouldn't be reading it until he was long gone. He could say anything he wanted. "Deal."

"All right then, I'll paint, you write." Fai stood to his feet, "But for now, help me put all my scraps against the wall so you can sleep on the floor and not on my canvases."

As they placed the paintings along the wall Kurogane realized it was already late November. "We...really don't have much time left together, do we Mage?"

"Nope," Fai said cheerily as he straightened a couple of his works of art. "Just about six or seven months."

_Six or seven months..._ Kurogane thought solemnly. That was not enough time for Kurogane to figure out how to tell Fai he loved him in a way the blond would truly understand.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Wow! I decided to update this story! Amazing isn't it?! I've actually had this chapter written for a couple months, but I never got around to posting it because I got sick and then I had to update other stories and it just never got done, but here it is now.

I have to say that this chapter is pretty simple and straight forward. We learn a little about Fai's past, which isn't nearly as complex as I usually make it, and we do learn how he became invisible, even if Fai didn't mean to give it away. However how his invisibility works won't be explained until later...sorry.

Read, review, enjoy!

* * *

"Are you absolutely insane?"

Fai yawned and stretched his arms out in front of him, one hand was delicately placed over the other before he pulled them back and sat up straight in his chair. The action reminded Kurogane oddly of a cat getting up from a nap. "Insane? Possibly. Absolutely insane? Doubtful." He yawned again and placed one hand on his face. "Besides, it's just math, and even if we did learn something useful in this dreaded class no one notices me. I could snore and no one would care."

"I'd hit you," Kurogane said bluntly.

Fai smirked from behind his hand, "You don't count as no one. You're everyone."

"That makes no sense."

Fai leaned his head on one hand and then grinned widely at Kurogane, "To you, but to me it makes all the sense in the world!" The blond boy sat up straight once more, grabbed his books, notebooks, pens, and pencils before finally standing to his feet. "So, how's your mother?"

Kurogane grumbled to himself. He doubted Fai meant to do it, but every so often he spoke in riddles. People like Fai weren't supposed to speak in riddles, old men who told the same stories over and over again were supposed to speak in riddles. "She was awake when we visited yesterday, she seems to be doing a bit better."

"That's good. Come on Kuro-chan! Gather your stuff, it's time for lunch." Fai ran off toward the door.

Kurogane sighed, _Sometimes he acts way too happy for the situation he's in. Who does he think he's fooling? _The black-haired boy picked up his own stuff, discretely tucking a red unlabeled notebook underneath the rest of his stuff. A thought struck him. "She asked about you."

Just as Kurogane had expected the statement stopped Fai dead in his tracks as if a hammer had hit him on the head. "Who asked about me?"

"Mother. It wasn't by name, but she asked 'where's that nice blond boy that sometimes comes home with you?' It seemed like she really wanted to see you."

Fai slowly turned around, "Wow." He smiled. Bingo, Kurogane got what he'd wanted. It was a real smile, a smile that said he was pleased to hear those words. "After three years, she's finally starting to notice me. What about your father?" Most people would say this comment with sarcasm dripping from the words, but for Fai the words were sincere and happy, he was glad that time meant something.

"He knows you exist, but beyond that, not much on his own."

"It's still something. Really, it makes me happy. It's not exactly sight, not like you see me at any rate, but it's still...something. Something, something." Fai hugged his books even more tightly to his chest.

_Now that is the Fai I should see, not that fake stuff. _Kurogane almost couldn't stop himself from smiling. "You should come next time. It'll make her happy." He made the comment sound like a mere suggestion, as if it were something he couldn't care less if Fai did for not, but he hoped the blond would say yes.

Fai nodded, "Okay, I will."

_Score. _Kurogane allowed one side of his lips to curl up into a smirk and he rearranged his things in his arms so that he could roughly place one hand on the top of Fai's head. "Lunch now."

"Yes."

* * *

_"Even though I rarely call you this when we're speaking, I'll call you Fai when I write to you. It's easier that way._

_The first thing I'm going to tell you is not the most important thing I have to tell you, but it's still important. I hate your parents, and I think you should defy them and go to art school. You really have talent and if that isn't what you should be doing with your life I don't know what you should be doing. I do know that you shouldn't be doing herbology. Let's face it Fai, you hate math and science._

_Now I'll tell you the most important thing, and I'll never say it outloud so you had better not lose this notebook if you ever want to be reminded of it." _Kurogane's pen paused on the page. He wasn't sure if he wanted to write the next words or not. He did, but like most people he feared that once Fai read it, he would never talk to him again, or some other crazy story. At last he forced the pen back to writing.

_"I love you."_

He made a face of displeasure and then on the line below it he wrote one other word, _"Romantically."_

The face deepened and he sighed. He closed the notebook and opened the notebook he was supposed to be doing bookwork in. Writing to Fai was hard. Even knowing that Fai wouldn't be reading this until he was somewhere far away from Kurogane and that they probably wouldn't be seeing each other for a long time after that, if ever, it was hard. He didn't want to write the wrong thing. He didn't want to write something that would make Fai cry, or make Fai feel a gap between them. He wanted the words in the notebook make Fai feel endeared. He wanted Fai to know exactly how much he meant to Kurogane and how close he wanted them to be. He wanted Fai to feel loved, in the purest sense of the word.

It was hard.

He didn't know what to write. Kurogane was probably the person who knew the blond boy the best, but, as he had found out on Saturday, there were many things about Fai that he did not know. There were many layers waiting to be unearthed and discovered. There were many things about the guy he loved that he did not yet know or understand. Even so he wanted to know them all and he wanted to embrace them all for even if they were bad or unsightly, they were a part of Fai.

What could Kurogane write that would make Fai happy? Make him feel like he was beloved? The only thing he could think of was to write whatever came to his mind, write down anything and everything, for if he kept no secrets from Fai, Fai would be comfortable with that. Perhaps that was what made it so hard. He wanted to write down everything, but when he tried, his mind automatically tried to only think of things Fai might like, and that left him completely blank.

The bell rang. Kurogane had not done a single question of his homework. He grit his teeth and picked up all his stuff, Fai would have to help him with this stuff, even if he didn't take the class Fai probably knew English better than most people in his class. Fai just picked up on things that way, especially things that he might actually need, like English.

As Kurogane left the classroom, hands grabbed onto his arm and pulled it tightly against a warm body. "How was English?" Fai's voice trilled as they began to walk.

"Like every other day in English. Do you think you could help me with the work I didn't finish?"

"Yep." Fai's arms finally released Kurogane's arm so that he didn't have any more problems with walking. "English is easy for me."

Kurogane snorted, "Did your parents make you take special lessons when you were younger?"

"Yes."

Kurogane paused, he'd been joking when he'd said that. "Really?" The thought continued to shock Kurogane even after he'd thought it through. _I knew Fai's parents were a bit wacked...and I do want to hit his father, but what kind of parent seriously puts their child through that when they're young?_

"Yes. They travel to English speaking countries quite a bit, so they thought Yuui and I should know English as well as Japanese."

"Yuui?" He remembered Fai's parents had mentioned that name too. They had mistaken Fai's voice to be Yuui's voice.

"My brother," Fai said simply. "Are you going to open your locker or do I have to pick the lock?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bring up your brother." Kurogane felt Fai take his books from his arms and Kurogane spun the lock on his locker to get the metal box to open.

"No, you didn't. That's why I'm not upset at all."

"Your parents miss him."

"They do. He was their favorite. He was so much better than me. He loved math and science in a way I never could...but he could never draw even a simple heart. They made us study English, violin, piano, and math and science of all sorts. The things they thought were important."

"Harsh."

"A little, but Yuui liked the piano. I liked to hear him play. I can play piano, but..." As Kurogane shut his locker he saw Fai make a face. "I haven't since he died. I guess I lost the will to."

Kurogane sighed, "You said that you two were close, right?"

"Yes. We were so close...that when he died, I became invisible. Before that, people could see me fine, but when he left half of me was gone, so I guess the rest of the world decided I'd gone with him." Fai shrugged as if this meant nothing to him, but the small frown that kept over his face told Kurogane otherwise.

"You're here. I can see you."

"I'm know. It makes me happy." Fai held out his arms, offering Kurogane's books back to him. "I'd play for you, you know."

"Hm?" Kurogane quickly took all the books and set them in his backpack.

"The piano. If it were for you I'd play. No matter how hard it was. I love you just that much." That simple statement drove a dagger right through Kurogane's heart. He knew Fai was trying to be nice and sweet, but when Fai said 'I love you', he didn't mean it the way Kurogane wished he did.

"Is something wrong? You just went a little pale."

"No, no, I'm fine. You don't have to play. I'll never ask it of you."

The blond boy tilted his head to one side and smiled brightly, "Well, just in case curiosity ever got the best of you, keep it in mind."

* * *

"I'm home!" Kurogane yelled into the house as he came in. As Fai closed the door he quickly added, "I brought my friend with me!"

From the living room came a voice that closely resembled Kurogane's own voice. "That blond kid?" That was Kurogane's father. The first time Fai had come home with Kurogane he had commented on how much they resembled each other.

"Yeah!"

"All right! Just be quiet!"

Kurogane scoffed a little. _Fai? Quiet?_ _That's like asking honey to not be sticky._ Of course then again most people couldn't hear much of what Fai said unless he tapped their shoulder first so being loud was probably just a reflex. "You hear that?" Kurogane said over his shoulder to Fai. "Be quiet."

"Awww," the blond was pulling off his shoes. "What a shame. I thought I'd walk around the house singing at the top of my lungs."

"No you didn't."

"You're right, I didn't. Kuro-chan knows me all too well."

"Damn straight."

Fai slipped past Kurogane and slunk up the stairs. "Come on, homework."

Despite the fact that Kurogane knew he was the one who had asked for Fai's help with the work he grumbled to himself in complaint and followed the graceful boy with loud, heavy steps. Personally, Kurogane hated anything that had to do with school outside of school. There were far better things he could be doing with his time, not the least of which was writing more in his notebook to Fai.

Fai opened the door to Kurogane's room and sat his backpack down on the floor before he flung himself onto the floor next to it. As far as Kurogane knew, Fai felt more comfortable lying on his bedroom floor than he did lying in his own bed. Until he had visited Fai's house he had thought it was because Fai had come to spend so much time at Kurogane's house, but now he knew, it was because Fai's house had no warmth, no love.

"So?" Fai turned his head to look up at Kurogane. "Where's this homework of which you spoke?"

Kurogane rolled his eyes and sat himself down next to the blond. He took out his books and handed them to Fai. Fai's nimble fingers quickly found the lesson Kurogane was on and began to explain what the lesson was about. Kurogane didn't hear any of it. To him there was only silence as he looked at Fai's face.

He had always questioned Fai. He had questioned his sanity, his visibility, his personality, but now it was more than that. He wondered about his family, about why he was invisible, and he wondered about this brother. Kurogane wondered about everything Fai's world had to offer, and it bugged him. He felt like no matter how close to Fai he got he would never be able to know. It irked him because he wanted to know. Not only that, but he wanted to be the only person who knew.

"Kuro-chan!" Fai's voice became louder and broke through the barrier of silence Kurogane's ears had built up. "Are you listening to a word I'm saying?"

Kurogane sighed, no he wasn't listening, and he knew that Fai's reproachful words wouldn't make him listen. "Mage, when do you have to be home?"

"My parents won't be home until tomorrow after school."

As if this were a proper answer Kurogane reached over and closed the textbook, "I can't concentrate right now Mage, let's do something else."

Fai smiled. "That's all right. We have time."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: So, I graduated on Friday. I was originally going to post a new story at the time I posted this chapter, but I thought that since I graduated this would be a better chapter to post.

I'm falling behind on my chapters again, I really shouldn't do that.

Anyway, this chapter is from Fai's POV, but the next one will be from Kurogane's POV. I'm not exactly sure how far along this story is, but I do know that it won't be too much longer. I planned on this story being a short one from the start. In fact I think that next chapter will be a few months after this one takes place. So it'll take place some time in Spring.

Despite how slow the story seems to be going, I'm happy with the pace I've set. What I really wanted was to highlight certain points of the year, and I think I've done that rather well. I think that's all I really have to say so...

Read, review, enjoy.

* * *

Fai made an aggrivated sound as he sat down his brush. His fingers wrapped around the edge of his canvas and he whipped his arm around. The canvas left his fingers and the back of it hit the wall. For a moment the uncompleted picture stuck to the spot that it hit, but then it slowly sunk to the ground.

The young blond glared at the picture, a smiling, blond, and blue-eyed face looked back at him from the canvas' surface. After a moment Fai sighed and turned his face away from the picture that was supposed to him. He flopped down on his bed and put his hands over his face. His lips relinquished another aggrivated moan. _I'm not sure if I can do it Kuro-chan..._

Yes, the picture did look like him, but that was as far as it went. Fai never painted just for the physical aspects, anyone could do that. Fai painted to capture the soul of the thing that he painted. You could see it in all the other pictures that were scattered around his room, his pictures of Kurogane, landscapes, animals, even the rare abstract picture had a soul to it. Even so, the picture of himself had no soul. There was no love to it. It was just flat. It was just a picture.

Kurogane didn't just deserve a picture. He deserved Fai's very best work. Fai wanted to give him that for not leaving him during these past three years. Yet this was his third try at the picture Kurogane had requested from him and he still couldn't capture his own soul. His soul resided within him, he knew his own soul better than anyone else, so why couldn't paint it?

Perhaps he should tell Kurogane to forget about the notebook. It wouldn't be fair if Kurogane gave him a notebook filled with thoughts when he couldn't keep his side of the deal.

_I can't do that. This is Kuro-chan, I can't give up yet._

The blond forced himself up to his feet and left his room. The halls were empty, but that normal. He slipped down the stairs and stuck his head into the 'living room.' There were his parents. They were just sitting on the couch watching television. It was as if they weren't really alive. Not that Fai really considered his parents to be alive. In fact he didn't really consider anyone to really be alive, aside from Kurogane. To most everyone else he was dead, so they were dead to him too. Sure, they moved and spoke, but it was somehow not the same as Kurogane's and his own voice.

Fai wanted to see Kurogane now. Perhaps if he saw him he'd be able to paint himself, maybe if he saw the person who saw him he would see his own soul reflected in the taller boy's eyes.

He took in a deep breath and held it. Fai began to walk by the room, and his parents didn't say anything at all. One of the few advantages of being invisible, you could sneak out at any time you wanted. He pulled his boots on and grabbed his coat. Out the door he flew.

Once the artist closed the door he realized flaws in his plan to go see Kurogane. _He lives far away, I can't use my money for more than the bus to and from school without running out, and Kuro-chan's motorcycle is practically useless in winter._ That was dumb. What was he going to do now? He wasn't going to just go back inside. Kurogane had been absolutely right when he had said there was no warmth inside that house. There was more warmth out here in the frigid winter air.

Fai supposed he'd just take a walk.

Steam accompanied the air that left his lips as he sighed. He pulled on his coat and began to walk. As he walked the snow began to fall. He reached out with his bare hands and caught snowflakes on his hands. Of course they melted almost instantly, but even so Fai was entranced by the unique form of each snowflake before it melted.

This wasn't the first time Fai had seen snow, far from it, but every single time he felt a longing, as if he wanted to join the snow. No snowflake was invisible, each one was defined, different, and every person could see that. In the same way every human was unique. _Yuui was the one who pointed that out to me._ Fai sighed at the memory of the winter's day that Yuui had tried to make science seem interesting by sharing fun facts.

His eyes closed as he remembered everything that had happened on that winter's day. It seemed like winter was a very important season for Fai, he had met Kurogane on a winter's day, he had been born on a winter's day, Yuui had died on a winter's day.

As if on cue there was a car screeching in the distance and Fai entire body shook, Yuui's voice rung out in his head. _"Fai! Get down!" _He felt Yuui's arms wrapping around him and refusing to let go, even after all the life had left them. He was sure he could feel Yuui's blood trickling down his face and between his fingers because Fai was too afraid to move...

A car sped past him and a breeze hit his skin bringing him back to reality. He looked at his hands. What his mind had taken to blood was really just melted snow, the rest of it really had just been in his head. He wrapped his arms around himself. "Yuui...Kuro-chan..." He whispered as he wrapped his arms around himself. Only Kurogane's touch ever made him forget the embrace his brother had given him that day and he desperately wished he were here now to distract him from the attack of post-traumatic stress, but there was no one to comfort him here.

Fai was very grateful to the deity of time, for although time did not lessen the pain it did make the attacks of pain shorter and less frequent. Six years was not nearly enough time for the attacks to not come at least once weekly, but when they came during school hours he did not have long to suffer for Kurogane always lightened his mood. No matter how hard he could try to remain down in the dumps the moment he saw Kurogane's face he jumped up and became happier.

The wind blew. _I should get home. I have painting to do, I have music to practice, homework to do...I'm just too busy to stand around here regretting my brother's choice. _

* * *

"Morning, Mage!"

"Good morning, Kuro-chan!" Fai raised his hand high in the air and waved it rabidly as he got off the bus and approached his friend. Kurogane only raised the hand halfway, and didn't wave at all. Fai chuckled to himself. _That's so Kuro-chan-like._ Once he got in arms reach of the taller boy he reached out and took that half raised hand, his fingers wrapping tightly around it and bringing it to his chest. It seemed like immediately any pain that lingered from the previous day's attack melted away. He sighed contently.

"Hey, is something wrong?"

Slowly Fai shook his head, "No...not anymore."

"Did your parents do something?"

Fai couldn't help but give a small snicker. "If they were to do something it wouldn't so much be about what they did, but what they didn't do. Really now Kuro-chan, there's nothing to worry about. I just missed you. Sundays are very long when you're not there or when I'm not with you."

"Feh. Just come on."

Fai's hands released their hold on Kurogane, and the two boys began their way into school. "So..." the blond began. "Does Kuro-chan have any news for me from over the weekend?" His question was followed by silence, the type of silence that wasn't awkward at first, but steadily grew more awkward as the seconds slipped by. Fai didn't like that, it made him feel like Kurogane had forgotten how to see him. "Well?" he asked almost anxiously after almost a minute of nothingness had slipped by.

"Do you have anything to do after school today?"

Fai made a slight face, "Well, no. My parents are home, but they don't care, not really. Why? Do you need me to come help you with work again?"

"No." This was followed by more silence. They passed Fai's locker, but the lithe boy didn't bother to tell his friend they needed to stop. He was beginning to get irritated, why was Kurogane acting like this?

"Then why do you want to know what I'm doing after school?"

Ten more seconds of silence followed before Kurogane took in a deep breath. "We're going to visit mother today. I want you to come."

Fai almost tripped over his own feet as he heard that. He did remember the last conversation they had about Kurogane's mother, he remembered that Kurogane had told him that he should come with next time, he remembered that Kurogane's mother had mentioned Fai, but he hadn't given any thought to the idea of going to see Kurogane's mother after the conversation had taken place. It had seemed so farfetched. "Really?"

"Yes really. Geez, you act like no one wants you around, Mage."

"No one does."

"I want you around."

"You're not no one. You're everyone." Fai remembered that he had said this to Kurogane before, but the message obviously hadn't sunk into his brain. The boy wondered if Kurogane would pick up on the meaning of those words this time. He watched his friend's facial expression, but there was nothing except a slight blush as he turned his head_. He doesn't understand_.

"We passed your locker, didn't we?"

"Ages ago."

"You should have said something!"

"I was waiting for you to talk."

Kurogane sighed, shook his head, and turned around. "Stupid Mage."

"Silly Kuro-chan."

There was more silence as they walked this time, but to Fai's relief, it wasn't at all awkward. They stopped in front of Fai's locker and Fai's fingers began to turn the lock in its proper combination.

"So."

"So?" Fai repeated Kurogane's single word.

"Are you coming with father and I after school?"

Fai paused, then opened his locker. "Yes. I am."

"I'm glad."

This time it was Fai's turn to cause the silence as he shoved in and pulled at the things in his locker. When he finished he stood up straight and shut the cold metal door. "Me too."

* * *

"Why are you standing all the way back there?" Fai's blue eyes opened as he heard Kurogane's mother's voice drift past her husband and son to reach his ears. "I've been waiting for you to visit. Please come closer."

Fai could hardly believe it, she was speaking to him without Kurogane saying that he was here, and without his yelling at the top of his lungs. His feet seemed to act on their own as he came forward, Kurogane naturally moved to one side to allow the blond to stand next to him. "You'll have to forgive me," she said as she stared directly into Fai's eyes. "I know your face, and I know who you are...but I can't seem to remember your name."

"That's all right. You recognize more than I expect you to remember. My name is Fai."

"Yes," she nodded. "That was it. I was disappointed when you didn't visit last time."

"Why?"

"Well, you're a part of our family, aren't you?" This comment took Fai a little off guard. Of all the things she could have said this was the one he hadn't even considered. A part of the family? Anyone who looked at the family of three and then looked at Fai would be able to tell that they weren't related at all.

Fai shook his head and smiled gently. He was confused, but it was still a very kind thing for Kurogane's mother to say to him. "How am I family?"

"Kurogane speaks of you often, and you are often at our house. Whenever you are there it's very natural, as if you belong with us, and when Kurogane speaks of you it's always so fondly. He obviously cares very much for you."

"Mom..." Kurogane groaned.

"Well you do, don't try to deny it. I may not see too much of you, even though you are often in my house I can tell that you're a kind, sweet boy, who thinks nothing of himself and everything of the ones you love. I think Kurogane sees that too, and I think you see us in that way. So, you're family."

Fai stared blankly at the ill woman before him. What a kind thing to say. What a true thing to say. It was all true, he could see it reflected in her expressions, and in the way she looked between Kurogane and Fai. The blond turned his head to Kurogane for a moment and saw the same expression on him.

_Amazing...she saw what I couldn't._

Fai looked back to Kurogane's mother. "Thank you."

"For what, Fai?"

"For telling me what I need to paint."


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Not including this chapter there are two (maybe three depending on how I decide to break it up) chapters left. I know exactly what's going to happen, and so this is the next story I will complete...I think.

In my reviews I have been asked over and over again if I'm going to introduce any other characters. In the beginning I think I siad that I wasn't going to. Then I said that I wasn't sure. Now the answer is yes. They show up in this chapter. While they're minor characters in comparison to the main plot they are important to the ending. Do not underestimate their influence.

This is a long chapter (for me). I worked really hard on it, and I hope it shows.

Read, review, enjoy.

* * *

_Fai, there's now less than a month left of school. After that month is up, we graduate, your parents send you to college (a college you don't even want to go to) and I probably won't be able to see you for a long time. I don't want that, and I dread that day, even though it'll come no matter what I do._

_I think you dread that day too. The other students are all acting happy and jittery, excited in the most disgusting of ways. It's as if they think this graduation is nothing more than another summer vacation. It's like they think that nothing's going to change at all, like the world revolves around what they want. I know that you and I are different than that. Neither of us has been has happy as of late. You're unhappy because you'll be going somewhere where no one can see you at all. I'm unhappy because I'm losing the person I love._

Kurogane's pen stopped writing at that. It had become a lot easier for him to write that he loved Fai in the notebook, but every time he wrote down that word, love, he paused to think of how Fai would react to knowing that the only person who could truly see him, and a man no less, was in love with him. Kurogane didn't peg the blond as the type to start treating him as if he had the plague, but he didn't peg him as the type to return the love either. As much as the red-eyed boy hated to admit that he feared anything, he feared that Fai's knowledge of his feelings would change nothing at all. He feared that Fai wouldn't even acknowledge it. Still, Kurogane needed Fai to know before he left.

He put his pen back to the paper and began to write on a different topic.

_It's getting warmer outside now, the cherry blossoms are almost in full bloom. I remember that first year that we were friends I took you to see them. I could have sworn you glowed with happiness at the falling petals. I didn't think on it then, but now I do, and it makes me happy to remember how real your smile was back then. Perhaps that was one of the very first times I got you to really smile._

_I want to take you again. Today is Saturday, tomorrow we have school off. Maybe then._

Kurogane closed his eyes and scowled. He quickly closed the notebook as if he was afraid of letting anyone else read about how soft and kind he was when it came to Fai, not that anyone else would know who Fai was really. He sighed and looked at the clock. Three minutes to the final bell. He had taken to writing in the notebook in his last hour class. It was English, and although he had gotten better since winter the words still confused him and he found that Fai was the only person who made it make any sense. Because of this he spent the first half hour of class trying to figure out as much as he could, and the last half hour writing. He thought that to be a fair deal.

Around him the other students began to make noise as they picked up their things, waiting for the bell to ring. A few seconds later the bell did just that and all the other students left. For a minute Kurogane remained still as he waited for Fai's familiar face to appear in the doorway.

"As strong, still, and silent as ever, eh Kuro-chan?" Fai's laugh came from the doorway, and Kurogane finally stood to his feet. "How was English?"

"Better than usual..." Kurogane grumbled as the pair walked to the blond boy's locker first. "I got over half of it without any help at all."

"Good!" Fai's fingers spun the lock around and around. "I'm glad that it seems to be getting easier for you." The locker opened, and Fai placed everything in his arms in and took out his backpack.

"So..." Kurogane turned his eyes to stare at the opposite wall. "Are you free tomorrow, Mage?"

"I'm free from now until Tuesday actually."

"Really?"

"Parents left yesterday," Fai said as he closed the locker and they went to repeat the process at Kurogane's locker.

"You didn't tell me."

"It's just so normal that I didn't think to. Sorry, Kuro-chan. Why do you ask? Do you want to come over?"

"Yeah. Or I want you to come somewhere with me." Kurogane quickly spun the lock combination and opened the door.

"All right. You're welcome to come over any time. When do you think you'll come?"

The taller boy shrugged as he slung his backpack over his shoulder, "Any time, but it'll probably be tomorrow. Dad'll want me to clean the kitchen or something."

"Oh!" Fai's smile softened, but became happier at the same time. "Your mother's finally coming home isn't she?"

"Two weeks, but we want the house to be perfect."

"I understand, I would too." Fai paused as Kurogane shut the locker and then tilted his head as he looked up at his friend. "So, I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"I might come over sooner, if I get done with cleaning."

"All right, I better get going. I don't want to miss my bus. I'll see you later."

Kurogane waved a little as Fai ran off toward his bus and then went over to the parking lot. Since it was warmer out now, he rode his motorcycle to school instead of walking. It was faster, and Kurogane enjoyed the rush of the ride more than the silence of walking.

When he arrived home he took off his helmet and walked inside. His father was in the kitchen, scrubbing the sink so hard he was sure he could hear its silent screams of agony from the forced exfoliation. "Hey, I'm home."

"So I hear," his father chuckled and sat down his sponge. "How was school?"

"It was fine. Can I go to Fai's tomorrow?"

"The blond kid's place?"

"Yeah. Him."

"Sure, hell, why don't you go right now? Or is he busy?"

Kurogane thought of all the things Fai might be doing right now. None of them seemed very important. All of them included him being along in that huge house. "I don't think he's busy right now."

"Then why don't you go?"

"Don't you want me to clean? Mom's coming home soon."

His father chuckled and shook his head. "How long until graduation? A month? Less? Your mother's coming home, but I happen to know that if she comes home and finds out I kept you from that friend you hold so close to your heart for _cleaning_ she'll have my head. Go. Have fun. When should I expect you home?"

"Sometime tomorrow afternoon?"

"Sounds great. Tell...Fai. Yes. His name is Fai. Tell Fai I said hello."

Kurogane smiled. His name. His father remembered Fai's name. "I will. I'll see you later, Dad." With that Kurogane turned and raced up the stairs to his room. Without really thinking about it he took a set of clean clothes and stuffed it in his package along with his toothbrush and raced out the door. It wasn't until Kurogane was already halfway to Fai's house that he realized he had told Fai he would be there tomorrow. What would he do if Kurogane showed up now? Kurogane hoped he wouldn't be too upset.

The house Kurogane considered to be more mansion than house rolled up on Kurogane's left side and he parked the motorcycle. He knocked on the door and waited. There was no response. Was Fai out? No, that couldn't be. Fai didn't go out. The house just so huge that Fai couldn't hear him from wherever he was. That had to be it. The young man reached out and turned the door handle. It was open.

_I hope he isn't angry with me for just coming into his house... _Kurogane thought as he slipped inside and closed the door behind him. The sight of the front hallway made him sigh. _Just as cold as it ever was. Was there ever any warmth here? _His eyes furrowed as he tried to find a speck of warmth, and failed. There was nothing. It was so cold. No children had ever run and played here, even if Yuui had been alive when the family had come to this area they wouldn't have played in this house.

Kurogane could just see it. Fai and a boy who looked just like him, Yuui, laughing and talking as they walked down the stairs, but then they fell silent as their mother's voice yelled from whatever room she was in. He shook his head. He knew this was impossible. Yuui had been dead years before he knew Fai, and years before the Flourite's had moved here. The Fai and Yuui he pictured were no younger than the Fai he had met those few years ago. He couldn't see Fai being any younger than that. His imagination didn't go that far.

He sighed again and took off his shoes. A strange sound drifted to his ears. It was music. Not the kind of music he had on CD's or on his MP3...it was strictly instrumental. More than that, it was strictly one instrument. _The violin..._

Kurogane went up the stairs. The sound steadily got louder and louder until it reached its height. It was coming from behind a closed door. Kurogane remembered Fai pointing this out as the music room the first time he had visited, but it had been such a quick statement that he had given it no thought at the time.

As quietly as he could he pushed the door open. In the room stood Fai, the violin tucked under his chin, the bow moving along the strings at a fast pace, then it slowed down...and quickened again. Fai's eyes were closed as he played. He knew the song by heart, although it was no song Kurogane had ever heard. He meant to reach out to Fai and to make the lithe boy aware of his presence, but his ears couldn't stop listening, and his eyes couldn't stop watching. Both sight and sound were beautiful, and they wrenched at Kurogane's heart, threatening to pull it right out of his chest. It somehow made him love Fai more, and it made him want to pull the violin from the blond's fingers and pull their faces together, but he was still rooted to that one spot.

The song stopped. Fai's eyes opened slowly, as if he were coming out of a trance. When Fai's blue orbs set sight on Kurogane they grew wide, and his face grew red. "K-K-Kuro-chan!" The hands that still held onto his bow and violin moved to cover as much of his face as they would allow. "I didn't r-realize you where there. You should have stopped me!"

As Fai moved, Kurogane found that he could finally move again as well and came fully into the room. "No, I didn't want to bother you. Besides, I came early. Don't worry about it." He said in the manliest and tough voice he could manage without sounding exaggerated.

Fai sighed and sat the bow and violin in their case. "Still. You should have stopped me. It must have sounded so ridiculous..."

"Don't be stupid! It was beautiful!" Kurogane yelled before he could stop himself. He could feel his cheeks burn at the comment, but didn't regret it. It was true. It was one of the most beautiful things he'd ever heard. The sight was third to Fai's paintings and Fai himself.

Fai's face became even redder with embarrassment. "Thank you. I've been practicing."

"Practicing where no one can hear?"

"Yes and no. Practicing where and when no one _and everyone_ can't listen. I never meant for you to listen."

The comment stung. He remembered how Fai referred to him as everyone, so even he wasn't meant to hear Fai's music. Perhaps that was why it had been so beautiful, the most beautiful things were never meant to be seen, or in this case heard. _It hurts, but the fact I'm the only one who's heard it makes me love it even more. _"I still enjoyed it."

At this Kurogane noticed the smallest of smiles inch onto Fai's face. "Good. Keep a good memory of that song. You won't hear it anywhere else."

"Did you write it?"

"No. Yuui did. He gave it to me and said...and said that it was the song my soul sung."

_What a kind thing to say, to do. Yuui must have loved Fai as much as Fai still loves Yuui. _"I'll remember that."

Fai only smiled wider, his blush finally starting to fade as he closed the case and sat it atop a baby grand piano that sat almost unnoticed in the corner of the room. "Is that Yuui's piano?" Kurogane asked, remembering how Fai had told him Yuui enjoyed playing the piano.

"Yes. My parents kept everything of Yuui's. The violin I play was also his. They...threw mine out when we moved. They loved him so much more than they loved me. He was their gem. They stopped loving me after he died, and not only because I became invisible."

"I'm sorry, Mage."

"Don't be. I still love them. It would be so much easier if I stopped loving them too, but I can't. Still, I don't blame them for loving Yuui more, I loved him more too."

Kurogane grit his teeth and looked at the piano. How horrible. It made him want to punch a wall or something. A parent shouldn't stop loving one child just because the other child died! If anything that meant that they should love the remaining child more... "It's a lovely piano..." He forced through his lips at last, not knowing what else to say.

Fai nodded. "It is. Do you want me to play?"

"Huh?"

"Do you want me to play? The piano."

"I thought you stopped playing after he died."

Fai shrugged. "I did. I haven't touched a key, but I remember telling you that I would play if you wanted me to. No matter how hard it was." Fai's eyes looked at the piano, and then at Kurogane. "So, do you want me to play?"

Kurogane thought about it. _If I ask him to play, it'll be the first time Fai will play in almost seven years. It'll be a step forward. A step forward...but it'll also hurt him. I don't want that. If he were to hurt, it would be like hurting myself..._The same thoughts ran through his head over and over until he finally shook his head at Fai. "No. I don't want you to play. Not yet. I wouldn't mind hearing more violin though."

Fai laughed, and nodded. "Maybe later. Are you staying the night?"

"Yep, that's why I brought my bag." Kurogane said as he held up his backpack. Even though he only held onto one strap it felt like he could feel the shape of all the books, pens, pencils, papers, the toothbrush, and clothes.

"Great. Let's go move the canvases in my room around so you can sleep."

Kurogane only nodded and followed Fai up to his attic bedroom. As he stuck his head up through the floor he noticed Fai scamper past him with a canvas in hand. He opened the door to his closet, threw the canvas in harshly, waited for a moment and then shut the door tight. "You're not allowed in the closet!"

"So that's where you hide all the bodies of your victims...I always wondered."

"Seriously, stay out of my closet." Fai said firmly as Kurogane closed the floor door.

"Yes yes, I will. As long as you don't touch my notebook, I won't look at your painting."

* * *

"Now really, Kuro-chan...where are we going?"

"Don't ask questions. Just put on your shoes, Mage."

"But--"

"Mage!"

Fai pouted as he sunk to the floor and pulled on his sneakers. Kurogane smirked. He knew Fai hated not knowing where he was going, but in this case it was for the best. It would be worth it, to see the look of surprise on his face when they got to the park where the most beautiful cherry trees in the area grew. As Fai finished tying his second shoe Kurogane went and opened the door. "You ready?"

"Yep."

The sun was creeping higher and higher in the sky as the pair went out the door. Kurogane had planned it this way. It was early, but not quite early enough for Fai to suspect that they would be going to a popular place for people to go this time of year. Oh, yes, Kurogane knew that they wouldn't be the only people there, but that didn't matter. He didn't mind, and he knew Fai wouldn't mind. The only thing that would be on Fai's mind once they got there would be the cherry blossoms.

The red-eyed boy took a helmet off his motorcycle and offered it to Fai.

"Do you have two helmets?" Fai asked suspiciously.

"Yes."

"Kuro-chan..." The blond began in a tone of disbelief.

"Mage! Stop being difficult and put the damn safety regulation item on your head!" He thrust the helmet into Fai's arms and turned around to find his second helmet. _If he keeps this up we'll never even get on the road!_

It took several more minutes, but at last Kurogane swung his leg over the bike and prepared to take off. "Come on, I've told you how to ride with me before, right?"

"Ah? Yes." Even so, Fai hesitated before climbing on behind Kurogane and wrapping his arms his friend's waist.

Kurogane blushed beneath his helmet. He had forgotten that part. It was necessary, but it still felt so affectionate, and it made his heart beat faster. "Kuro-chan?"

"Y-Yes, Mage?"

"Is something wrong?"

"No!" Kurogane answered quickly, "Why would you think that?"

"It's just that you're hesitating."

"That's because you're not holding on tight enough, damn it. Just...hold on as tight as you can, and close your eyes."

Fai chuckled from behind him. "Kuro-chan is so secretive today. I wonder what he has up his sleeves. Perhaps he's more like a mage than I am..."

"Shut up and do it."

"Yes sir." Fai's voice mocked him, but his arms tightened around Kurogane's waist and his head relaxed into his back, Fai's way of showing his eyes were closed and that he trusted Kurogane to not let him fall.

Kurogane pushed down his blush as far as he could and then took off. The park he wanted to go to wasn't too far away, only a half hour on the highway, there were other parks that were much farther away, although they may have been more beautiful in the springtime. Kurogane weaved in and out of traffic, passed cars when he could, and went as fast as the speed limit allowed. For Kurogane, the speed limit wasn't nearly fast enough, but for Fai it seemed too fast, because every time he sped up, or passed a car Fai's fingers would dig into Kurogane's sides. Every time this happened, Kurogane couldn't help but smirk a little bit to himself.

When the half hour was up, and they arrived at the park Kurogane instructed Fai to keep his eyes closed, but to let go of him. Very reluctantly Fai obeyed, and Kurogane led him off the motorcycle, took off his helmet and led him up to the entrance of the park. "Now, Kuro-chan? I feel like if I keep my eyes closed much longer they'll glue themselves that way."

Kurogane chuckled, "Yes. Now."

Fai's eyes opened. They stared, and stared. It was a very long minute before Kurogane got the courage to ask; "Do you like it?"

"Do I like it?" Fai turned to him and smiled the same smile he had smiled the first time Kurogane had brought him here. A real smile, full of warmth, love, and happiness that it was a marvel to Kurogane how everyone else was blind to it. "I..." Fai paused and brought both his hands up to the sides of Kurogane's face and stared with marvel at him. "I..._love_ it. I love it. I love everything you give to me. You are my everything...thank you."

Kurogane smiled. He couldn't help it. It wasn't one of his normal, somewhat gruff smiles, it was just as soft and happy as Fai's. Fai was happy. He was happy. "Well then, go on, enjoy it."

Fai gave no verbal response, and only grabbed onto Kurogane's hand, pulling him along into the park. The blond stopped for every tree, to take in its beauty and while Kurogane saw every tree to be beautiful, but the same, Fai seemed to see differences in every single one.

About fifteen minutes into their tree gazing Kurogane noticed something that Fai didn't. Two people, a boy and a girl standing about twenty feet away from them. They were watching Kurogane, and possibly Fai, although Kurogane doubted that they could see the blond boy. He wanted to march up to them then and there and make them stop, but he gave them the benefit of the doubt for a few minutes...until he noticed that every time Fai pulled him off to see a new tree, they followed too.

He couldn't let that go on.

"Ah!" Fai's mouth made a sound of disappointment when Kurogane pulled his hand away from Fai's. "What's wrong?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll be right back. Go on without me."

"But..."

Kurogane reached out and gently placed his fingers and thumb at Fai's cheek. The thumb caressed the apple of his cheek slowly. He didn't even think about how affectionate it was, all he wanted was to make Fai stop making that worried and upset face. "Don't worry. I've been able to see you since the moment I met you. A moment apart in this part won't change that. I'll find you."

Slowly, Fai nodded and then took a step away from Kurogane's hand. "Okay...please hurry."

"I will."

Kurogane waited until Fai was looking at the next tree before he turned and marched up to the boy and girl, who upon seeing him leave Fai's side and come closer to them had turned and were now talking to each other, as if they weren't doing anything. As he got closer he saw that they were three or four years younger than he was. They were only about the age that he had been when he had first met Fai. "Hey."

The girl jumped, as if startled, and the boy looked up at him and glared. The girl had auburn hair, and green eyes, while the boy had brown hair, and brown eyes. "What?" The boy retorted.

"Why are you watching me?"

"Oh!" The girl shivered under Kurogane's gaze, but shook her head. "We weren't watching you! We...we were watching...him. Your friend. The blond one."

"Are you joking me? You can see him?"

The girl nodded. "Yes. Um...is...he, by any chance...Fai? Fai Flourite?"

This took Kurogane off guard. Not only could they see him, but they knew who he was?! "Yeah, he is. What's it to you?"

The girl looked at the ground and twiddled her thumbs as if nervous. "Well...My name is Sakura, and I live in the house he used to live in and...ah...I know he's...hard to see, and that needs to be fixed before he can do anything, but..." The girl bit her lip, and it took a hand on the shoulder from the boy for her to continue. "If...if he's cured by that time...I. I. I want him to paint for me!"

Kurogane's eyes grew as wide as they could be. What was this?! "Oh! No! He still paints, doesn't he?"

"Yeah...he does..." Kurogane rubbed the back of his head. "But how do you know so much about him?"

"I live in his old house. I've found lots of things. A violin, paintings, drawings, essays. I really...admire his work, and I want him to help me."

"Help you with what?"

"Well, nothing yet, but if...if he can be seen by the time it comes around, I would really love for him to come and paint for me. You can come too! There can be four!" The girl smiled brightly. "So...um...He lives around here?"

"Yeah. Somewhere near here."

"Great! We'll come back when that time comes. Oh! Thank you for telling us! I can't wait!" The girl smiled and laughed now, all of her shyness gone as if it had evaporated into thin air. "Come on, Syaoran! Let's go tell Touya and Yukito! We found him!" She grabbed the boy's, Syaoran's, hand and ran off away from him still laughing with joy.

Kurogane continued rubbing the back of his head, the greatest look of confusion on his face. What had been all that? He still couldn't figure it out. She wanted him to...paint for her? What exactly did that mean? He didn't know. He sighed, and decided to not tell Fai about it, while another person or two seeing him might make him happy, he didn't think that the girl's speech would make any more sense to him than it did to Kurogane.

He went on down the path to Fai, and offered the blond his hand when he found him. Fai eagerly took it and held it tightly to his chest. "You okay? You look dazed."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little...confused about what I saw."

"What did you see?"

"I'm not...sure. I don't think I could even properly describe it to you."

Fai shrugged. "Oh well. That's okay. I'm just glad you're back with me."

Kurogane smirked, snorted and shook his head as Fai looked back to the cherry blossoms. "Stupid, Mage. I never left."


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: This chapter did not come out at all like I had planned, however it still gets me to the spot I need to be and is right in alignment with my plans for the next and last chapter.

I'm actually glad this story is ending, not because I hate the story or anything, but because I haven't completed any stories in a while, and the less stories I'm working on, the more I can complete. The more I complete, then I can move onto other stories I want to write (I've already got two other stories for different fandoms I want to write...)

For the time being, I'm starting to beta my own stories again, as my lovely beta has said that I can start doing so. I can't promise that'll make my posts any faster though, after all, I have to write the chapter for it to get posted. That doesn't affect this story much though, I already have half the last chapter written.

Read, review, enjoy.

* * *

When that day finally came, Fai did not walk with the rest of the class. Kurogane had tried day after day to get the blond boy to change his mind, but in the end, the only answer he ever got was one that he could not argue with. "What if they call my name and they can't see me?" Fai did not explain any further than this, he didn't have to. All the consequences laid themselves out before Kurogane at the mere mention of the situation.

So, when the day came, Fai did not sit in his proper place among his classmates. He sat among the crowd, third row back, third seat from the left. Kurogane knew that was exactly where he sat because as he came on stage, his gown nearly touching the floor, he saw Fai's face stick out from the rest. It stuck out, not because Kurogane was in love with him, but because unlike the other people in the audience, who had tears of joy in their eyes or were smiling, Fai had a slightly disgruntled look on his face. Kurogane knew that most likely meant someone had not seen him sitting there and had tried to sit on him. He sighed.

As he sat down, Fai's face lit up and he smiled, waved, and made a motion that looked like he was laughing. Kurogane gave a small wave back, but then sat back to let the ceremony begin.

At the beginning Kurogane tried to pay as much attention to every word as possible. You only graduated from high school once. Despite his effort, as the speeches wore on, and the people on either side of him began to smile or cry, he got bored, and he let his eyes wander. They always ended up on Fai, who, he noticed with a smile, had a smile plastered on his face, but his eyes were glazed over. Fai was just as bored as he was.

With a small shake of his head Kurogane folded his arms over his chest and waited for the whole thing to be over.

When he was finally let off the stage Kurogane found Fai first. His parents were here somewhere, farther back probably, and with the crowd of people who refused to give an inch unless you threatened their family there was no way Kurogane was going to be able to get to his parents for quite some time.

"Congrats."

"You too," Kurogane nodded at Fai. "After all, you graduated too, even if you weren't up there."

"True. I am now the proud owner of a little piece of paper that says I passed high school. In fact, I got mine several hours before you did." The blond laughed lightly and moved closer to Kurogane to allow other people to pass through. "So, are you going to go celebrate with your parents now that you've got your diploma?"

"Yeah, that's the plan. Do you want to come along? Or do you have plans?"

Fai shook his head, "My parents want me home. After all, I'm leaving tomorrow."

Kurogane stood there for a moment, letting the words sink in. "What?"

"Yeah...I didn't tell you. I'm leaving tomorrow. My parents don't want me around anymore. They can't see me most of the time, and when they can I only remind them of Yuui. My college experience is full and paid for as long as I stay in the biology major. They're shipping me off via train to get an early start."

"Can they do that?!"

"Either way they already have, and that is why..." Fai pushed his way through a couple people, reached behind his chair, and pulled out a fairly large, rectangular object, wrapped in shiny blue paper, "I bought the painting with me."

"But..." Kurogane shook his head. _In less than twenty-four hours...he'll be gone?_ "I didn't bring the notebook with me."

"I didn't think you would, if you want, you can give it to me at the train station tomorrow at one-thirty. My train leaves at two."

"I see..."

"Well," Fai pressed the wrapped painting into Kurogane's chest. "Take it. Open it when you get home." Fai smiled bright as day as he tapped the edge of it against Kurogane, urging him more and more to take the painting from him.

Kurogane took the painting, and held onto it as gently as though it were Fai himself, "How can you smile like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're happy? You're losing...everything, to go to a place you don't know, to study a subject you hate. How can you smile at that?"

Fai chuckled, "Look! There's an opening, and I see your parents. Come on," the blond grabbed Kurogane's arm and pulled him through the crowd, before pushing him off by Kurogane's mother and father, who were standing there with a smile, waiting for their son to come to them.

Fai bowed to them, greeted them, and then quickly excused himself from their presence and ran out the door. His last words were, "Remember, Kuro-chan! One-thirty!"

* * *

The painting was beautiful. Kurogane had to admit, it looked like Fai had put all his heart into it. It was exactly what he had asked for, a self-portrait of Fai. It was painted in muted colors, Fai's hair a softer yellow, his skin paler, his eyes less vibrant. This choice of color gave the painting an almost magical feel. In the painting Fai's lips were upturned in a smile that did not _quite _carry to his eyes as he held his hand out gently, as if asking the person viewing the painting to take his hand and join him in the painting. Around his neck was a blue and white scarf, his hands covered by nearly navy blue gloves. In fact, Kurogane now noticed, the entire panting was blue, white, or black, save for Fai's hair and skin.

Kurogane shook his head, his mind kept wandering all over the painting that Fai had painted for him, and really, he needed to get going so that he could really see Fai's face for what could be the last time in a very long time.

The teen grabbed the notebook from his backpack and went toward the door of his bedroom. He paused to take one last look at the painting. He noticed something for the very first time. It was snowing in the painting...just like the day they had met.

He shut the door behind him.

"Do you need a ride, Dear?" his mother called as he came down the stairs.

"No, Mom, I'm just going to ride my motorcycle. After all, I'm going there and coming back by myself."

"All right...if you come back with a friend, I won't mind."

Kurogane smiled softly, knowing that his mother was somehow secretly telling him to not let Fai go on that train. "I don't think it's going to happen." He pulled on his shoes and ran out the door, "I'll be back soon!"

The ride to the station wasn't a long one. Only five minutes on the main drag of town, not including stops at the stoplights. It was a warm day, but Kurogane felt like he was freezing. Fai was leaving, and there was nothing that could be done about it.

He felt so cold, even as he walked up into the station and looked around the benches. It wasn't long before his eyes landed on Fai's blond hair and blue eyes. As he came closer Fai stood to his feet. "You're a little early, Kuro-chan."

Kurogane's eyes narrowed at he took in the sight of Fai. There was nothing wrong with the way Fai looked, but his surroundings were void of suitcases or bags. "Where's your luggage?"

"Oh? It was all sent off a week ago."

Kurogane's eyes narrowed even more, "How long have you known that you'll be leaving today?"

Fai's smile widened, "Two months."

"Why didn't you tell me, Mage?" Kurogane grit his teeth. It both angered him and hurt him that Fai hadn't even told him until yesterday that he would be leaving. If anyone would have been able to help him carry the burden, it would have been him.

"Because, I knew you'd dred graduation then. I didn't want that...I wanted you to be happy. In fact, I was just going to leave without you knowing, so that you could have celebrated last night in peace, but then I wouldn't get the notebook, and...you'd be even more angry at me then you already are."

"Yes, I would be. I'd also be even more hurt."

Fai's smile faded away and he blinked in surprise, "Hurt? Why are you hurt?"

"You didn't tell me!"

"I was protecting you. You would have done the same."

Kurogane stopped to think about that for a moment. Fai was right. He would have done the same thing to keep Fai's mind at ease. He relaxed his jaw and looked at the ground. He tried to not be angry, but all he got was a simmering anger, and a stomach that felt like it had a pit in its bottom. "When will you be back?"

"Next summer I suppose. If my parents don't change the lock on the door before then."

_That long?_ "You can stay at my house if they do."

Fai gave a small laugh, and a bright smile. "I won't impose. You'll have moved on by then."

"Bullshit I will have! You're my friend, Mage! I won't just forget about you!"

At Kurogane's words Fai quickly looked around at the other benches and cowered a little bit, "Lower your tone, other people will look."

"Let them look!" Kurogane shook his head. "I can't believe you'd even think that! You're such an idiot!"

Fai looked at the ground, "I'm sorry...I'm really just saying all the wrong things, aren't I?" He rubbed the back of his head nervously, and a small sigh escaped his lips. "Did you unwrap the painting?"

_That's right, I forgot to mention the painting...how beautiful it is._ "It's better than I could have ever expected. You outdid yourself, especially with your color choices."

"Thanks. I really tried my best."

"It shows, and as your reward, and here is the notebook, as promised." Kurogane made a small face as he held the notebook out for Fai to take. All his secret thoughts were now Fai's to read. No matter what, he wouldn't regret giving them to the person who held Kurogane's heart in his hands, but he did hope Fai wouldn't frown upon those thoughts.

As if afraid that Kurogane would yank the notebook back at the last second, Fai grabbed it and held it to his chest in such a way that said no one else was ever going to get a hold of that notebook. "Thank you. I'll treasure it. I'll read it after I get there...and I'll call you after I do so."

"Okay, I think I can wait that long."

Fai smiled. It was such a sad smile, and yet Kurogane could see just the smallest hint of happiness behind that smile, like a glimmer of hope. "My train will be getting here soon. Will you stay with me until it does?"

"Of course you idiot. I didn't come here just to leave early." As if everything were normal, Kurogane rolled his eyes and pulled Fai over to the side of the track. They stood just behind that thick, yellow line that you weren't supposed cross. For the first couple of minutes they stood side by side, not touching, but then Fai reached out and grabbed Kurogane's hand. Kurogane intertwined their fingers. Fai squeezed his hand and kept on holding on to it as hard as he could. It was the first indication that Fai had shown that he was scared or upset. It made Kurogane a little happier to know that he was not really the only one upset by this day.

They stayed like that, holding hands, until the train rolled into the station. Fai hesitantly pulled his hand away. Kurogane wanted to grab a hold of it again, tell Fai to stay, but he didn't. He knew Fai would never agree to that. This needed to happen. He didn't know why, but it needed to. "I better get on, don't want to miss it."

"Yeah..."

"I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Mage."

Fai closed his eyes for just a moment. When he opened them, he looked like he was about to cry. "Good bye."

When Fai stepped on the train it felt like Kurogane's heart shattered.

_When will I see him again?_

* * *

It was snowing outside. It was December seventh. It was cold outside, but it was warm in the room Fai sat in. It was a classroom, full of tables and stools, beige walls, with light brown floors, a chalkboard, and windows.

Fai looked out those windows, watching the snow fall to the ground, and melt upon contact. It wasn't beautiful like snow normally was. The sky was that dreary kind of gray that just made you feel down in the dumps, and the fact the snow didn't stick made it seem almost like it was just raining. It was the kind of day when no one felt good. Fai definitely didn't feel good, you could tell by his face. He looked half starved, and very tired, like he never slept.

The truth of the matter was, Fai always felt like the day looked today. He almost constantly studied so that he could keep up with his work. His roommate couldn't see him (of course) and thus never bothered to leave any food for him, even if Fai had been the one to buy it in the first place. He never seemed to be on the right schedule to get to the cafeteria either. So Fai had taken to eating convenience store food, which never filled him, and despite how tired he always was he could never seem to fall asleep at night.

The blond sighed. Perhaps tonight he'd fall asleep when he first put his head upon the pillow.

"There you are, Fai." A red bag of chocolate fell into Fai's lap.

He picked it up and smiled softly. _Well, at least there's one good thing about being here._Fai turned around in his stool, to face the person who spoke to him. "Good afternoon, Ashura." Ashura was a teacher here. He taught theory, but he also tutored in music. The best part about Ashura was that, like Kurogane, he could somehow see Fai all the time. "Were we supposed to have a lesson today?"

Ashura shook his head slightly as he gathered all his hair back in a ponytail and sat in the stool beside Fai. "No, but I knew you'd be here. I thought I'd bring you sweets, and if you want, we can go somewhere to eat a proper meal. Try and get some fat back on your bones."

Fai smiled, but did not laugh or chuckle. It had been a long time since he had done either of those things. "It's all right. You know you really shouldn't pay special attention to certain students."

"It's just you. No one is going to mind, especially since everyone else ignores you."

Fai's smile brightened a little. "Maybe tomorrow, Ashura. I really don't...feel good today."

"Then maybe today's the day you should finally open the notebook your boyfriend gave you. I'm sure he's been waiting for that call."

Fai bit his lip, and his face turned bright red. _He always does this to me. Why does he have to call Kuro-chan that?_ "Ashura, he's not my boyfriend."

"I don't believe that for a second. You react the same way every time I mention him. One does not turn bright red at the mention of a friend."

"Well, if you wouldn't call him my boyfriend maybe I wouldn't turn bright red."

Ashura chuckled, "I don't think it makes a difference what I call him, but that's not the point. The point is, you should read it. Maybe you'll finally cheer up a bit."

"Or I'll become more depressed."

Ashura shook his head. Sometimes, Fai was hopeless. "Do you have your violin?" Fai shook his head. "I see. Well, then you should go home, get your work done, sleep, steal food, hide it in your room, eat the chocolate I gave you, and read the notebook. You can't avoid it forever."

Fai hung his head a little and stood to his feet, "I know...but every time I try to open it, I find myself afraid of what it says and close it again." The young man hung his bag over his shoulder and smiled at Ashura. "But thank you anyway. When's our next meeting?"

"Next Monday, my office."

"Okay, I'll be sure to bring my violin."

"I look forward to seeing you really smile when you play. Perhaps you should try to paint something again too. I know you've been having an artist's block, but--"

"It's not a block really, I just...can't paint. I'm not inspired. I think biology killed my art."

Ashura sighed, and waved Fai out the door. Fai knew that Ashura knew the conversation was getting nowhere. "Have a good day, Fai."

"You too."

The walk back to the dormitories was a fairly short one, and Fai tried to make the best of it by trying to catch snowflakes on his tongue as he went, but it didn't really work very well, and he only caught one or two by the time he got back to his dorm.

As he opened the door to the suite he shared with his roommate (there had originally been one other roommate, but he had dropped out) he heard laughing and talking from the other room as his roommate and his friends talked. Fai gave a sigh of relief. He wouldn't have to deal with him for now. Even if he was mostly invisible, he always feared that one day his roommate would see him and kick him out of the suite because he didn't know who Fai was. It could happen.

The blond slipped into his room and shut the door quickly. He sat his bag on his bed and opened it. The first thing his fingers touched was the notebook. It was silly, but even though he had never read it, he kept it with him at all times. Fai took a deep breath and closed his eyes before taking the notebook in his fingers and sitting on his bed quickly, and opened it in front of him before his mind could change.

He opened his eyes and began to read, whether the words the notebook contained were good or bad.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: This computer is so frustrating! Either that, or it's Firefox...Grr...Can't figure out how to change my homepage, and whenever I look up how to do it, it just tells me to click Tools and then Options. There is no thing that says options! Maybe it's because this isn't a Windows or a Mac... At least I get Internet I suppose. I'll just have to deal.

Last chapter of this story. This is now a complete story. I'm very happy with the way it turned out. I sincerely hope that the rest of you enjoy the ending as much I as enjoyed writing it.

Now I just have to finish _Yami no Yume_... That may take me a while...

Read, review, enjoy.

* * *

Kurogane was just walking through the door when the phone rang. His parents weren't home, so there was no one else to answer. Kurogane sighed, he hated answering the phone, especially now that he was out of high school and everyone expected him to be off at college, even though he had decided to stay home for a year, save up money, and spend time with his mother. It was such a hassle when he picked up the phone and the person on the other end asked why he was there and not at college.

For a moment he considered letting it ring, but then decided that his parents wouldn't like it if they found out he'd just let it ring, and he picked it up, and pressed talk. "Hello?"

The voice on the other end was not the voice he expected, _"Ah, Kuro-chan?"_

For a second Kurogane's mind ran blank. "M-Mage?" That was all his tongue could manage.

From other other end Fai chuckled and Kurogane could just see him nodding, _"Yes, Kuro-chan, it's me. I finally called."_

Kurogane growled, it had been seven months since the blond had left on that train! He'd been waiting for this call for so long that he'd given up on getting it! "Took you long enough!"

Again, there was a chuckle. _"Yes, I'm sorry about that. I did keep my word though, I did read it after I got to college, and I did call you after I read it. It just...took a lot longer than I thought it would. How are you?"_

'How are you?' Was that all he could say? That stung. Kurogane shook his head, "I'm fine. I've been working down at the local grocer, stocking shelves, and lifting boxes. Mom's been doing well, and Dad's been getting brighter every day that she's been home."

_"Good. I'm glad you're doing well, and I glad you stayed home. I don't know how I would get in touch with you if you had left."_ There was silence on the other side of the phone after that, and Kurogane somehow knew that Fai was biting his lip on the other side. At last he spoke again, _"Listen...do you have work next...Friday?"_

"No, I have Friday's and Monday's off. Why?"

_"Well, I would like it if you would be down at the park, where you took me when we first met, at five o'clock next Friday."_

"Why?" _There's nothing there. You're at college._

Fai sighed softly, _"Please, I just want you to go there. Think of it like...you'll be in touch with me, even though I'm not there. Like memorial. Next Friday...it'll be exactly four years since we met."_

At this Kurogane could only nod, even though he knew Fai couldn't see him nod through the telephone. "All right, Mage. I'll go down there."

_"Thank you. I have to go now. I'll talk to you soon, okay?"_

"Yeah, just make sure it isn't seven months next time."

_"I will, don't worry. Good bye."_

"Bye." Kurogane hung up the phone. He felt many things at once. Anger, confusion, relief, sadness. He didn't know what to think about Fai's call. He hadn't mentioned his thoughts on the notebook at all, but he wanted him to visit the park. It hurt, and yet the confusion dulled the pain.

From his dorm room, Fai hung up the phone. His hand grazed lightly over the notebook. He smiled. So those were Kurogane's thoughts. His precious thoughts. Unadulterated, pure, simple. Fai loved them. He loved every last one of them, just as much as he loved Kurogane himself.

It was weird. Fai had heard so many times that when you were relieved of something, or when you felt good, you felt light, like a feather. Yes, Fai felt relieved, but he didn't feel light at all. If anything he felt like a ton of bricks had been placed on his shoulders. He left like he was alive...in the sense that everyone around him was alive.

Fai frowned. _I wonder..._ The blond boy stood up from his seat on his bed and went over to the corner of his room, picking up the violin case that lay there. He opened it, took out the violin and bow, and began to play. It wasn't the song his brother had written for him. Kurogane was the only one who had ever heard that one, and he was probably the only one who ever would. No...Fai played a different tune, one of the one's Ashura was teaching him.

His heartrate quickened as he waited for the first part to happen. It always happened because the violin was loud, loud enough to attract attention. Sure enough, a few moments later there was a knock on his door. He stopped playing. "Come in," he said softly. Soft enough that normally, the knocker didn't even notice.

The door opened. Fai's breath hitched.

In the doorway stood his roommate. A boy, the same age as him, with bright violet eyes and messy black hair. His name was Kamui. Fai knew that, but that was just about all he knew about him, other than the fact that either he or his friends ate a lot.

Kamui blinked at him, and tilted his head cluelessly to one side. "Who are you?"

Fai's skin went paler. _It's amazing. He can see me now. _At last he parted his lips and spoke. "I-I'm your roommate."

* * *

It was nearly five o'clock. Kurogane thought to himself as he walked through the park. It was cold, but it wasn't snowing. Kurogane wasn't sure if it was better because it wasn't snowing, or if that just made it seem even colder. Either way he was uncomfortable.

He made his way down the path, toward the bench he remembered that he and Fai had sat on four years ago today. The closer and closer to the spot he got the stranger and stranger the sight of it became. There was someone else sitting on the bench. A young man, no older than he was. He was long, and lanky, like a stick. He wore blue from head to foot, and was bundled up in a winter's coat and a scarf. His head was bare, and the hair that fluttered slightly in the wind was blond.

Kurogane narrowed his eyes and all doubt left his mind. It was Fai. He couldn't quite be sure at first, this person was thinner than the Fai he remembered. His hair and skin was paler. It just didn't quite look like his Fai. Yet it was. He had to be. "Mage?" He called out questioningly.

The blond's eyes opened. Even the blue of his eyes was paler.

"Good afternoon, Kuro-chan." The voice was the same.

"What are you doing here?" Kurogane asked as he came closer to Fai, his eyes narrowed and inspected the blond as if he expected him to disappear right before his eyes. "I thought you weren't coming."

"I didn't think I was coming either, but...I told Ashura..."

"Ashura?"

"A professor. He's tutoring me in music. Uh..." Fai rubbed the side of his face with one hand and gave a small laugh. "I told Ashura what happened and he insisted on paying for my trip. He said I needed to be here."

"Why?"

"Ashura can see me," Fai paused, "Well, everyone can see me now, but Ashura was like you, he could see me before. Ashura also kows how much you mean to me. He knows a lot of things. I was going to write you a letter. It's cheaper, and it's somehow better than email or telephone, but Ashura insisted I tell you face to face."

Kurogane didn't know what to ask first. He was tempted to ask about people being able to see him. He certainly hadn't mentioned that over the phone, but his curiousity about what Fai needed to tell him in person won over the wonderment about Fai's visibility. "Tell me what?"

"Kuro-chan?"

"Yes, Mage?"

"About the notebook...is everything you wrote...still true?"

Kurogane's heart sank. The notebook. _Now you're going to discuss it. _Should he lie? Should he say that it wasn't true anymore? No. Kurogane could have slapped himself for that thought. He hadn't lied to Fai in the notebook, he wasn't going to lie to his face now. "It's all true. Every last word of it."

Fai's eyes looked toward the ground. A soft smile played his lips. "I'm so happy."

Kurogane blinked, he hadn't been expecting...that... "You're happy?"

"Of course!" Fai looked up at him with a smile that was somehow happy, relieved, but most of all, contented. "Of course I am...I thought you could never love me back."

Kurogane stood dumbfounded as the meaning of those words sunk into his skull. Was he really hearing what he thought he was hearing? Was he misinterpreting the words he was hearing? "Kuro-chan? Are you...upset?"

Kurogane shook his head, both answering Fai, and snapping himself back to reality. Before he was really, truly aware of what he was doing, he had wrapped his arms around the blond boy and was holding him tightly against his chest. "Of course I'm not upset you idiot. I just....wasn't expecting you to say that." He grumbled as he sat his chin on top of Fai's head. He was happy, truly he was, something they had both appearently thought impossible had happened; the person they loved returned their feeling. Still, despite how happy he truly was, it was somehow embarrassing too. How long had they both felt this way, and not told the other because of fear? Kurogane did not want to think about it.

The young man tilted his head and placed his lips on the top of Fai's head for just a moment. He heard Fai chuckle. "What?"

"That's not how you kiss, Kuro-chan." The blond pulled away from the hug and placed both of his cold hands on either side of Kurogane's face, "This is." Fai leaned forward and up to place his lips gently against Kurogane's in a kiss.

Kurogane couldn't help but smile as he kissed Fai back. It was funny, he could feel that Fai's touch was cold against his skin, but he wasn't cold anymore.

* * *

"Can people still see you?" Kurogane asked as his boyfriend reached out to catch one of the many falling cherry blossom petals. It was Fai's spring break, and Ashura had again paid for Fai's round trip to come visit.

"Yes," Fai said as he finally caught one and let one finger gently stroke the petal, as though it were a baby chick. "People pay a lot more attention to me now. You'd be surprised."

"No, I wouldn't," Kurogane shook his head. He'd always known that Fai would be popular if people could see him. It was just that people couldn't see him until last winter. The red-eyed boy watched Fai look up at the trees and then continue to try and catch more of the falling petals. "Are you sure that it's all right that we came here again?"

"Of course," Fai grinned and blew the caught petals at Kurogane's face. "I like tradition." The blond chuckled and pulled Kurogane along to the next tree. "It's not boring, it gives me a nice feeling of nostalgia."

"If you're sure..." Kurogane grumbled. He himself wasn't bored, but he wasn't exactly sure how Fai was satisfied doing the same things over and over again. Fai was an artist, despite his biology major, and artists were always looking for new things to draw or paint. How would Fai find new things to capture in his art, if he only looked at the same things again and again?

"There he is! I told you, Syaoran!" Kurogane heard a girl's giggle follow the statement. He felt like he had heard the name Syaoran somewhere before, the voice too, was familiar. He looked over his shoulder to see two kids, a couple years younger than he and Fai were, come running up to them. "And he's visible too! Ha!" The girl laughed once with joy and did a spin. It made her look a little like a ballerina.

Kurogane folded his arms over his chest. He remembered these two now. A boy who hung ever so slightly behind a girl who said she wanted Fai to paint for her. "You two again?"

Fai, for the first time, looked at them. He looked at them and then he looked at Kurogane. He looked back at them. "Again, Kuro-chan?"

"Again, Mage. They were here last year too."

The girl, he thought he remembered her name to be Sakura, nodded. "Yep! I'm Sakura, and this," she wrapped her fingers around the boy's hand and pulled him forward slightly so that he was level with her. "Is Syaoran! You're Fai Flourite."

Fai blinked. "Why...yes. I am. Is there something I can help you with?"

Sakura nodded, "Shall I tell you the long story? Or the short one?"

Fai chuckled. Kurogane could tell that the girl amused him. "The long one, please."

The green-eyed girl nodded. "All right. You see, I am Sakura Kinomoto. When I was much younger than I am now, I moved into a big house far away from here. The house was huge! My brother, Touya, his friend, Yukito, Syaoran, and I went looking all over it. We found lots of stuff."

"Like?"

"A violin and paintings. Lots and lots of paintings. I loved them all. I hung them all over my room when I was younger. My parents said I should throw them out, but they were so pretty. The paintings were all signed by Fai Flourite. That's you."

Fai gave a small laugh. "Yes, I'm Fai Flourite. You found my paintings? Okay. They were from a long time ago. I'm not upset that you kept them. In fact, I'm kinda glad someone liked them enough to keep them."

Sakura smiled, "But that's not all. You see, this summer, Syaoran and I are going to travel."

Fai looked up at Kurogane. Kurogane knew that Fai had probably been able to follow the girl's story up until that point. Now Fai was probably wondering what this had to do with him. "Okay..."

"And we'll be traveling all over the world."

"Okay..."

The girl smiled. "I want you, and your friend, to come with us."

At this Fai blinked once in confusion and stared at Sakura. "Why?" That one word from Fai's lips mirrored Kurogane's thoughts. Why would this girl want Fai, who she only knew through his paintings, to come with him? In fact he wondered even more why both he and Fai were invited. It would possibly make more sense if it was just Fai.

"Because," the girl sighed and she seemed to become more calm. "I don't want to take pictures on this trip. It's so special to me, and photographs are cheap. I think a photograph captures the image, but not the memory. I'm going on this trip to collect lots of memories, of all sorts of places."

"But that doesn't explain--"

"Paintings are so much more personal. They capture everything in the way the painter sees it. I can't paint, but you can. I want you to come with, so I can learn about the person who's paintings I loved, and so that person can paint those memories."

Fai shrugged. "I don't have anything specific planned for summer, but I don't have any money either..."

Sakura smiled widely. "That's okay! I've been planning this trip for a very long time, and I have enough money to pay for all four of us!" The girl held her arms out as widely as she could. "Plus, the more the merrier! Memories are no good if you're the only one that has the memory! You have to be able to talk about it with someone. That's why I wanted you to be visible when I came and asked you...if you can't be seen...then your memories will be different, even if you're in the same place."

For a moment they were all quiet. Each one of them seemed to be in thought it seemed. Kurogane himself thought about how Sakura was right. Fai's memories would be different, because he wouldn't see, hear, touch the same as everyone else if no one could see him. It was probably exactly like looking at a photograph. You could see it, but you weren't there.

It was again Sakura's voice that broke the silence. "So? Will you come?"

Fai's blue eyes looked to the falling petals and then they looked to Kurogane. Kurogane didn't need to think about the answer to Fai's unspoken question. A trip would do Fai plenty of good. It was in fact, and answer to the question he'd been wondering a little while before. If Fai went on this trip he'd see lots of places, paint lots of things. It would be good for the artist. He nodded.

Fai smiled at Kurogane and then grinned at Sakura. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes," Fai said softly. "Kuro-chan and I will go with you and Syaoran this summer. Let's go paint memories."


End file.
